WORST THINGS TO SAY TO SOMEONE THAT IS SINGLE /BEST RESPONSES TO SHUT SOMEONE UP WHEN YOU’RE SINGLE

Standard

old maidWhy are you still single?
I used to lock my boyfriends in a basement; one of them escaped and told others, no one wants to date me now.

Wow! You’re biological clock must be ticking now.
No, what is ticking is a bomb that’s on my purse, I’d run if I were you

Your great aunt Whatever is old and alone, never got married and she had the saddest life, be careful!
Good point! I’ll just go smoke and drink alone to make sure I don’t get to that age

Who keeps you company on a lonely afternoon?
My imaginary friend Mary, she comes over and we have tea, she’s sitting right next to you right now!

I don’t see why you’re single when you’re so pretty.
Maybe not shaving my armpits and not wearing deodorant has something to do with it.

When are you planning on getting married?
If you get me a husband for my birthday, I’ll get married that day. Please order with time to spare in order to plan a big wedding.

And then the last one, from Sex and the City:

Charlotte: You have to take risks so you don’t wind up an old maid.
Carrie: Oh! That’s right. Must not wind up old maid. How will l remember that? Does anybody have a pen?

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